Sad Man, Small Dog: Case Study #1

An interview With Zachary Mack, the boyfriend of a girl with a tiny dog, who also happens to travel a lot:

SMSD:  So, you’ve been spotted walking Alice, your girlfriend’s Maltese, on more than one occasion. Does it ever feel as though she’s removed your testicles, put them in a Mason jar, and hid them in a place where no one will find them for a thousand years?

ZM: I’m not going to say that it’s a great feeling. When I walk her alone, I do get a lot of girls coming up to me on the street telling me how cute my dog is, but the point of walking Alice is to keep my current girlfriend, not to find a new one.

SMSD: What kind of dog would you have picked?
ZM: I’d have gone with something that intimidates people on the street, like maybe a Pitt Bull or a Doberman. I sometimes feel like dudes are going to beat me up in my neighborhood for looking like such a puss.

SMSD: Any suggestions for guys who find themselves stuck in this situation?

ZM: It’s not as bad as you’d think. As much as I dislike going out on cold nights and waiting for this dog to pee, I dislike it when my girlfriend refuses to put out even more, so it all works out in the end.

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3 Responses to “Sad Man, Small Dog: Case Study #1”

  1. Haha, nice post and smart man! =)

  2. Ahh, this gave me quite the chuckle this morning. Can’t wait for more!

  3. “Does it ever feel as though she’s removed your testicles, put them in a Mason jar, and hid them in a place where no one will find them for a thousand years?” That’s the best interview question I have ever heard. EVER.

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